I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
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