I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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