they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
