i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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