she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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