We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
