Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
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