TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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