it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize