Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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