This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.