YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
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S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
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we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is