it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize