I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
