omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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