I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize