Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
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I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
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i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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