I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
