I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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