just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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