Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
