in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
