Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
