just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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