At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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