Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
