I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
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