you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize