At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
