I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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