At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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