so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
