Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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