I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
