Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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