U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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