Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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