i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize