as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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