Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
