I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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