so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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