The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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