I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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