i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize