So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.