I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
