I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize