I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I didn't notice because vodka
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
