Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
