Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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