So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
