Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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