About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
